Well it would be several feet long if I needed it to be, but in the world of corporate relationships giant hobo beards are frowned upon for some reason.
Dude. Get hobo beard, with axe, checked shirt and dungarees. Go into business world. Chop the heads off those who frown, so that they can't any more.
Wait, aren't you like 16. How long is your beard? I say this, because I've been trying to grow a beard for 5 years now, and failing miserably
I get to grow the mountain man beard, because well, that's what I am now. I brush mine (hairbrush, it's thicker than my scalp) and trim the flyaways if they persist. Wash with shampoo every shower, brush immediately after, air-dry. Just wring the worst of the water out and let it dry naturally. When I trimmed mine at Halloween for my Abe Lincoln, Vampire Hunter costume, it reached my chest. It's almost back. Thinking of braiding it for when I go hunting and foraging (materials for knife handles.) Gets caught in trees and underbrush.
Bottom part of my goatee is about 15-16 centimeters long. All I do is tie it up with tiny rubberbands in two places.
Easy. Trust me, the facial hair may be lacking but I have a chest to match a young Sean Connery, I'll have you know Well, that is until I get the philips out and trim it neat.
Hmmm. It's no good, it's coming off. Nothing I try makes it behave properly. I even tried whisked egg whites and treacle but apparently that makes me smell like a rotting hobo after a few days, and I won't be allowed to hide the pork fillet again until it's converted back to manly stubble.
[/ Gets you there every time. Or just click on the quote button? My previous post may not be true, but the beard is a magnet for food and drink and the end of day aroma could be likened to that of a wet goat after a particularly careless day's eating.
Don't get many goats, wet or otherwise, up here in Edinburgh. So will have to take your word on their smell.