Funny slips of the tongue

Ever said something unintentionally funny/rude?

I was just talking to a mate about Bond films and I said From ***** With Love, instead of From Russia With Love or Octopussy (I guess it could have been worse, I could have said The Man With The Golden...)!!

Anyone slipped up like that recently?

 

"floppy dick" Instead of "floppy disk"

its a killer.

 

bwahahaha, noice one!

 

The usual Orgasm instead of organism smack bang in the middle of my biology presentation the other day

 

Cunny Funt

 

Calling my current girlfriend the name of one of my ex's.

I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS

 

I bet most of 'em give you a good roasting for that!

 

Haha i know the feeling i went out with a girl when i fancied the pants of someone who was my best mate (and the gf knew it), kept calling her the wrong name. Was kinda awkward

 

Yeah, we didn't talk for about 4 hours afterwards. I'm just glad we wern't being intimate.

I would've gone home, but she lived ~70miles away.

I do this sort of thing all the time though, I think I'm dyslexic or something. Hell, I even write the wrong things down sometimes, thank god you can edit posts

 

So yeah i would recommend the 6800 if you cant afford a 7800.

Oh damnit

 

And the man lives up to his title.

 

slip of the tongue mouse?

 

Indeed

I cant think of any bad slips of the tongue of my own

 

Aslong as you dont give me reason to say that about you & your avatar

Back on topic

I hate blurting stuff out without thinking then the "oh £$*! did i just say that!" part afterwards.

/last post in thread.

 

I get this allot and dont even realise it - even after people point it out to me but its rarely a "risky" thing i say.

An example of this is when i was telling my friend to pick me up for work the next day as he dropped me off ( we both work together and he picks me up every morning)

Me: Ok so pick me up at 12pm, we start at 2pm so 1hour or so to get there"
Friend:You mean 1pm right?
Me: ?
Me: I said 1pm didnt i?
Friend: err..no you said "Repeats what i said"
Me: er...i dont get it, wheres the problem?
Friend: Your an idiot.
Me: ??

 

I was talking about condominiums and was not sure if I was going to say condos or condiminiums so I accidently said condoms, right in the middle of a conversation with my mom

 

This was more of a hand/pen slip: My high school computer science teacher once wrote "dick drives" on the white board instead of "disk drives". Being Finnish and not knowing English that well she didn't even notice her mistake, even when the whole class laughed their asses off . She was a horrible, horrible teacher btw...

 

I remember at school I once wrote "I like Cock" instead of "I like Coke" in a writing test.

 

got this call from a client on Wednesday

" hello I need some help my server has become perverted"

*I'm sorry I didn't quite hear you, what did you say the issue was again?*

" MY SERVER, IT HAS BECOME PERVERTED!"

*Oh I see hold on (mute giggle giggle giggle) I've dispatched a technician he'll be there shortly.

"thank you" (click)

Thank god he hung up before I had to ask him if there was anything else I could help him with. since it was a work server for a conservative company and not connected to the internet I assume he meant corrupted, When I asked him to repeat himself he practically yelled. told him I had to send a tech because I was laughing way to hard to get ahold of myself enough to troubleshoot the call.

 

So it's true!!!!

Yeah, once while eating dinner, I meant to ask my ex to pass me the salt and I said "You've ruined my life you ****ing bitch!" by mistake. Fruedian slip I reckon.

The above didn't really happen, it's an old joke, but I've been tempted a few times.