Then you should explain how much of a c**t he should feel about that and that it's his fault. Point him to the nearest food bank.
That screams addiction issues. Whether it be narcotics or gambling or the debt associated with those activities, I'd (pun uniniteded) put my money on that.
I've actually had to lend a friend money recently as he needed £50 for petrol due to starting a new job and decided to get a payday loan . He was completely against the idea until he learnt how much interest they would charge. He payed it back on time and all was well. It just depends on the person.
Well then you made the right call. It's very twattish to lay a guilt trip on someone if you can't get your way, it's his fault the situation he's in. Listen, I'd lend mates money but mates who I would have to twist the arm of for them to borrow it off me because they wouldn't want to be in debt to a mate. He needs to sort himself out, hopefully by you saying no will be the start of him doing that.
I used to work with this guy who used to sub from our boss. By the time he was paid he owed my boss pretty much every penny. And it just went on. Growing up and being a man means getting in front, and, especially if you have kids, doing everything in your being to stay there. Borrowing is the weak way out. I'm terrible with money. I have compulsion issues something rotten but I am nor a borrower or lender be. At the end of the day where I grew up it was every man for himself (my "friends" literally used to burgle mine and eachother's houses, every man for himself) so I soon learned to keep my financial situation a closely guarded secret. That way if people think you have nothing they won't even ask. So as much as I act irresponsibly my private side is very aware of where I am. I have had to learn that by myself. I got into debt with Vodafone (got a phone whilst I was on the dole knowing I couldn't pay the bill) and had the bailiffs around. That was about 25 years or more ago and it has never happened again. Mostly because my family said "You got yourself into it...." and I had to pay it a fiver a week until it was paid. It was demeaning, belittling and embarrassing. I have never borrowed or loaned another penny since. Unlike my cousin whose mother constantly bailed him out and paid his phone bill even though he was earning £350 a week in 1998 after taxes (bricky). And you know what? she's still stuck with him paying for everything because he doesn't want to sign on. I bet she regrets it now !
Like you, VT, I also have a bad case of the *I must have it now!* in my blood. I used to always ask to borrow cash from the 'rents or get an advancement on my pocket money. It got to the point where I had no pocket money for six months (and my dad gladly agreed to loan it to me) which taught me precisely how bad it is to constantly borrow cash. I have always tried to stay within my means after that (since the age of 14) and I soon after learnt the lesson he was teaching me. It was invaluable, in all fairness. The only times I get loans/borrow cash now is when stuff goes on the credit card knowing fully that it can be paid off, or when we actually need a loan such as our mortgage or for a car. We pay on credit and pay off at the end of the month to get the points, nothing more. I am glad that you told him to go elsewhere. You do not need people like that in your life. I've been there as well, not for cash, and it simply isn't worth knowing them. They are not friends if they only come to you when they need something. That is all.
Or just p*ss poor money management. I'd bet on him having an iphone on an overpriced contract, a cable tv subscription, life insurance, buying branded clothing, ordering take away and so on...
Have you met him ? lol He's not happy even called me this morning but didn't even answer the phone to him.
Good lad. That guy is a sponge, not a friend. A friend wouldn't get mad because you couldn't lend them money....I don't think any of my friends would even ask but I would always be happy to offer if I knew they needed it. Let him get rogered by the payday loan sharks tbh.
He does claim to be struggling to feed his kid, so any insurance not required by law is fair to criticise.
Nah, I think life insurance (for your family's benefit) is a perfectly valid expense. It's also a very, very cheap cover. Plenty of things on your list are fair game for criticism, with the caveat that we have no idea what he's actually spending his money on currently, but life insurance isn't really in the same bracket imho. In short: life insurance isn't what I'd class as a luxury.
I've now blocked his number from my phone, it was getting a bit much. I aint a bank. Hmm The Royal Bank of Behemoth PSML !
I hate people like that. But I used to be a massive soft touch too. I used to handout free IT advice, repairs and troubleshooting for free, just because I was a friend/family. I was the worst kind of doormat, seriously. I seriously took a voucher for a free game from the GPU as payment for a build; I walked out and realised what a massive ass I was being. That was seriously the last time I did anything for free. I lost a lot of friends; I then realised none of them actually were friends.
