So has anyone else here experienced this? For the last two years I have been unemployed in Greece, and got into a routine where I'd spend up to eight or nine hours a day on the computer either messing around or playing battlefield 3. I'd got myself into a routine, where I didn't see the point in getting up early just to see my family looking at me because I wasn't doing anything with my life, and started going to bed at 5am, and getting up at 2pm. I didn't socialise with anyone, apart from those that I played with on line. Has anyone else experienced this? Nobody seems to talk about it, but surely I can't be the only one? Is it purely because I was unemployed? My parents say that even when I was employed, I'd still end up going to bed very late and go to work with not enough hours sleep. I've moved back to my parents house in the UK now, as the tennants are moving out, and I am going to rent the other two rooms out. I'm looking for work, and I've had a few interviews that I thought went well, but nothing yet. I got here on the 11th of September. So I suppose the question is, is it possible to be able to have a normal amount of play time, without reverting back to what I was doing before? What is a normal amount of play time? One day a week for three hours?? Every day for one hour? What's a good time to play, since as with anything I do on the computer I quickly lose track of time. What's a good way to snap you out of what you're doing? Or do I have to go cold turkey and give it up for good? I had to leave my computer in Greece, but brought my gpu's with me, and just yesterday bought new parts and built a new computer. I haven't put the gpu's in yet and only just finished downloading the bf4 beta. I'm not sure whether I should install the gpu's or stay away from the game till I've managed to find a job or some way of limiting the amount of time I play. Thoughts? I need to be more social and try and meet new people, but the only things in my area that I could do is join the photography club, where they want £45 membership fees, for what I don't know, or join the gym. People don't really talk to eachother in gyms though do they? I mean I thought it was like the elevator/tube ettiquete where nobody talks to eachother. The good news is I've got into a routine where I go to bed at 12 and am up at 8. I plan on buying some new trainers to go running as well. Any advice would be really appreciated.
Set a shutdown timer on your PC to force yourself to go and sleep. This worked for me. You will feel much better and you will start feeling encouraged to do more things. Once you start doing other things outside of playing on the PC, you will spend less time playing these games. The more you start going to clubs/gyms, the more you will get to know people and start doing other things with these new associates. This is linked to above, you can set a period where you stop playing and decide to go out for a run.
Quick question, how old are you? Certainly when I was younger I had the time to waste and occassionally would stay up til 5 am to play games. But generally those were a couple of times a year. I'm working full time now in London, and my lifestyle is generally: work, meet up with people in central once or twice a week after work and maybe one other friend at the weekend. Total 3 days socialising a week. Sometimes I get 30-60 mins playing games during the week, but not often. I like to have 1 full day to myself at the weekend to do what I want, usually a gym session + a decent gaming session. Average, 3-4 hours gaming. Add in mobile gaming on my commute and it goes up to 6-7 hours gaming probably. You have a few options: join the photography club. I might do this myself and frankly, £45 (a year?) ain't all that much if you actually go. They will have other interests and chances are they'll play games of some kind. You may have to learn to play games you wouldn't normally play! Also, get into co-op games on the same screen with a console. I get my mates over sometimes to play FIFA or Halo: social + games x beer =awesome.
I would say it's mainly to do with you being unemployed. Once you get into a routine you should be fine, play as much or as little as you want in your spare time (so don't stay up all night playing games, but if you've got a couple of hours spare in an evening and you fancy playing, why not?) I'm currently on a placement, so have to go to bed at sensible times etc, but since apart from work I don't have that many commitments, if I wanted to I could play for 4+hours most nights probably. I mean I don't, but in theory I could, I have friends who have been off the last couple of months during their summer holiday and they basically did you what you did, became nocturnal, it's not something I really understand, since if you want to play games with people in similar timezones then I would think (and certainly from my experience) that you'd want to play in the evening, not early morning (1-5am). tl;dr Don't worry, just get into a routine and see what works for you, if you want to socialise more then do it Join clubs/go places etc, but also feel free to play some games if you enjoy it and especially if it's with friends.
I'd say focus on getting a job first. Get settled and then shoe horn gaming time in. It won't do you any favours if you turn up to an interview tired because you were on BF4 for the preceding 12 hours. Once you're in the routine of work/eat/free time/sleep/work then see about reintroducing games - Maybe with the shutdown timer mentioned above if you find it hard to stop and go to sleep at a reasonable hour. Since I started working I could probably count the times I've spent inordinate amounts of time playing a game in one session on one hand. I'm pretty sure it's GTA V, when I stayed up until 12pm (Oo, late)
I have a second monitor with rain meter plus some other utilities like temps precision x etc. But essentially I can keep an eye on the time as I play. Which I think is important. Sometimes I would finish up and not realise how late it has gotten
There are programs designed to do it for you if you look around on the web but, the main method is setting it up in "Task Scheduler" (under Administrative tools). From there, you want to create a "basic task" on the right hand pane. Click "Task trigger" and choose the number of times you want this task to happen (in this case set it to once). It will then ask you to choose the time and date for your event. Choose a start a program and then hit next. In the "program" field, type: C:\Windows\System32\Shutdown.exe and type /s in "add arguments". After that, hit finish.
When you work you get into a routine and when you don't unless your very self controlled you swap that for another routine. Some say treat finding work like it's your new job to find a job but it's difficult, no money so you can't really do anything and online gaming is cheap. For a few hours your not an unemployed loser your a soldier who is playing pro..so why not make it 9 hours?
How addiction works: - Anything can become addictive: not just substances, but also activities, experiences, relationships. - It is an attempt at self-regulation of mood. You feel crap, you want it to stop and feel better. - The more powerful it is at making you feel good, the more addictive it can become. - Addiction also has a strong placebo component to it: it is about context and expectation. - You know when you are addicted, when the substance/activity/experience/relationship interferes in your daily life activities, functioning and relationships, takes over your life and you are absolutely unable to go without. So it is not about how long you play, or how often, but how much it stops you doing other things that you need to do in a healthy, productive, balanced life. From what you are saying, you seem to be playing games because unemployment and lack of meaningful activity makes you feel bored and crap, and playing makes you feel excited and good. It is very good at making you feel that way, so you keep going back to it. You need to start engaging in other activities, experiences and relationships that make your life feel meaningfully busy. Games will become less important then, and you'll find that you'll want to play them less often, and when you do, you are able to enjoy them for what they are and walk away from them afterwards.
How can one know if they are actually addicted to something? By managing to maintain a full time job and other life commitments would that mean that someone doesn't have an addiction? or just that if they do it is not that bad? (sorry to hijack)
It's a matter of priorities. If we look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs, and find that a substance/activity/experience/relationship starts to become a priority over physiological, safety, relationship, esteem and self-actualisation needs then it can be said to be an addiction. Similarly if, over time, it actually starts to cause harm to the person and yet they persists in it, then it can be said to be an addiction.
Is "harm" subjective though? For example, the person who could be thought to have the addiction would say it is not harming them, onlookers would say it is - who is right? And could it be to do with the addiction as to why the subject feels they are not harming themselves - as they feel whatever the addiction might be is actually adding benefit to their life rather than subtracting. Similarly - to an outsider looking in, they could see someone who is addicted to something, where as the subject could just really like something and continue to do everything else that's important in life. (I don't think I understand Maslow's - I just don't understand the pyramid idea or what it's supposed to be representing)
This. Years ago, I had an issue with playing CS Source. I didn't really play all that much but it caused a rift in my marriage. It was that real consequence that made me evaluate my behavior and I was shocked how difficult to give it up. Afterward, I couldn't conceive why it was so hard to give up and how much happier I was and why it took so long for me to change things. I can say that I was much happier and it made me appreciate my relationships with people that I actually knew and cared about and cared about me. Please start the process in changing your behavior, it's not fun but I promise you will appreciate it later. Get out and take more photos instead.
You are not alone, in Japan it's more talked about and has a name. Hikikomori I'm assuming you're young. Don't install the GPUs. Don't install any games. Don't play any games. If you do then sooner or later (sooner) your '3 hours a week' will have a 'I've got the flu, I'm going to game today' or 'I had a good interview I will reward myself with an all-nighter'. Get out. Get running. Get a job. Do the jobs you're looking for have anything to do with gaming? If not then forget about gaming until you've got a job. Finding it hard to get a job? Do some volunteer work, meet people, make contacts. Let people see a confident you and see what you're capable of. Talk to people, make first contact with the companies / places you want to work for. Ask for their advice. Show people what you're doing to improve your prospects of getting a job. Show them the skills you're learning, the good work you're doing in your own time. Anything you can do as well? Anything to get working a bit? Odd jobs? Freelance work? Without knowing your skills advice is always going to be vague. Good luck.
Harm would be in terms of health and functioning, as in: being able to meet one's life needs. It's a bit more negative than that. In the long term people continue their addiction not because it makes them feel good, but it because it avoids them feeling so crap. They do it just to feel halfway close to OK. They get no real joy or fulfilment from it. The idea is that the needs at the bottom are the most basic needs. They need to be met first before we can attend to needs higher up the pyramid. In order for us to be psychologically and physically healthy and fulfilled individuals, all needs in the pyramid need to be met, but the ones at the bottom take priority. This is why we are so good at moving the goal posts. We strive to meet a need, and as soon as it is met, we become aware of another need and strive to meet that one. Conversely, when a basic need announces itself, we drop pursueing the higher-up needs and focus on meeting the basic one first. A nice example is homelessness. People often make the mistake to think that the solution is just to house the homeless person --find them a place to live-- and the problem is solved. In reality, now the next need announces itself: that of relationships and belonging. The previously homeless person is warm and fed, but now feels lonely and isolated. All their mates are on the street... So often they end up on the street again.
Its always interesting to get the professional point of view on these matters. Also why is morality under the subject of safety in that pyramid?
It's security of morality. We need to feel that there is a societal moral order, in order to feel safe. BTW Maslow's Hiearchy of Needs is not a perfect model, and research on it is conflicting. But as a rough concept it has enough practical validity.
Isn't there an inbuilt auto-shutdown feature in the power settings? There definietely is on mac as mine auto shutsdown at 2am
