LOL Stupid things we've done without thinking

I couldn't find my bike lock so just took my mum's combanation lock, problem was I forgot the code when I came to unlock it, and had to start at 0000 and work my way up, think it took just over half a hour to reach it; luckly it's not too high a number.

 

i managed to make a joke about anorexia in front of an anorexic.

I then tried to ring her to apologise and got her answerphone....

she rang me back during lunch, and i picked it up without checking who it was and said...
"gimme a second.... im stuffing my face"
She hung up

 

i could have got that open in 5min theres a trick to it that dosen't envolve tools!

 

LOL!

 

I bought a Sharp LCD TV.. 'nuff said.

 

Ran out infront of a car at a junction (I didn't see it) was about half way across when I turned around to get out it's way, I then realised after turning around I wanted to go to the other side of the road and seemed worth the risk so turned around AGAIN infront of a car and ran back across the road My friends were in hysterics but I got across the road in one piece. Driver was not really pleased and seemed a bit confused
If I can think of anything else I will post it, this is a good thread

 

Accidentally power-drilled my own fingers at work.

 

Actually, I've done that too, lol. You'll never do it again, that's for sure!

 

Added some chili in the dinner (she knew), oral both ways afterwards. Nothing special until shuttle hit the venus. Ohshi... JAMES, WE GOT FLAMES!

She was trying to shed off her private parts by running around the flat, I nearly died of laughter (and burning sensation).

Ow.

 

[insert expression of abject horror and disgust]
Dude! That's awful! Was it serious?

I'm pleased to see lots of "started X routine Y hours ahead/behind time" submissions. I've gotten ready for my day as much as 2 hours early AND two hours late, I think - my alarm clock hates me. And I'm not very good at reading it whilst half-asleep.

My latest is forgetting washing powder. I usually notice before I start the machine, but I have put whole washes in and not realised until I came back for them an hour later that they're not any cleaner...just wet.

Oh, and I tried to make cottage pie, but forgot the mince. So...I just oven-made a deep dish of mashed potato. Genius.

 

Eh the damage wasn't serious and struck my fingertips. I was lucky that I had the Phillips bit on, and not the Morse twist drillbit. It's just that I was using my left hand (not ambidextrous) and it jumped the screw and went right into my right index fingertip. Now I can't write, type, or use the mouse normally, but there was one unexpected benefit: my penmanship is drastically improved! Should heal up over the weekend so I'm A-OK!

 

A couple more.

Once Super Glued my fingers together. Probably pretty common but not the thing to do when working in a repair garage. Luckily I pried them apart with water and a spoon before anyone noticed and got back to work.

Once slipped on ice at work landing flat on my back and was so desperate to get back on my feet before anyone saw me that I fell straight back over. I felt my safety was more important than my dignity at that point

 

When I was around 12, practicing football on the pitch with me league teammates, I got a bleeding nose. The coach had me sit on the water cooler and gave me isopropyl alcohol-soaked gauze for it and I accidentally sniffed it, not knowing it wasn't water with which it was wet. Either the whole city suffered a blackout, or it were my lights that turned off. Face went into pitch grounds.

 

When I was still in school, about 9-11 I can't remember exactly, I was putting stuff away from P.E. with one of the teachers and he left the shed, closing the door on the way out, probably forgetting I was in there.

As a young boy with an active imagination I immediately assumed the door was locked, before taking one of the javelins stacked against the wall and smashing a window. I climbed out, cutting up my hands nicely, and only then did I try the door...

Oops.


Also

One of the few times I've ever laughed out loud when reading.

Genuinely hilarious

 

Today actually, I went to pick up a pain at work, not realising it had it's handle over a pot of soup for a good 10 minutes. For the year and a bit I have worked there, I have never ever burnt my self. Not once.

Second degree burns right up my Index, Middle and Ring fingers...

 

Not a drill but I did manage to get a #1 center drill all the way through my left pointer finger from a manual turret lathe. Off to the hospital with drill embedded in finger. Nurse the size of an NFL tackle cleaned the wound with a tiny brush like a baby bottle brush. The pain was tremendous.
Not the center drill, the nurse. It seems lathe cutting oil is quite nasty inside the human body. Infects quickly. Sioux Tools - made hydraulic and air powered drills and such.

john

 

I shocked myself (twice in 5 min) with my test PSU....

I really need to put heatshrink over the metal bracket on the switch.... like the one that I cut off before I decided to use the PSU.

 

When I was about 8, there was a laptop plugged in and sitting on a desk at my house. I pulled out the AC power source from the laptop and put it in my mouth.

BzzzZ!!

 

I once pushed a flathead screwdriver into my palm. I was going to remove a LED that was sitting in a hole in some plywood. It was wedged in there pretty hard, so pulling it out didn't work. I ended up pushing it out with a screwdriver.

The problem was that I was holding the plywood with my other hand, and as the LED came loose, the screwdriver continued into my palm. That was probably one of the most painful things i have done.

I shocked myself yesterday. I was testing a set of HID Xenon bulbs. To power the I just used an ATX power supply. I didn't think about the fact that 23KV cables tend to leak a bit of current, so I was holding the bulb with one hand, and rested my other hand on the power supply (To turn on the switch).

As the bulbs ignited it felt like my chest was going to explode...


This one could have gone badly, though...

 

So I was texting my friend on Friday.

Me: I totally have a new phone

Friend: Who are you.

Me: Your mum lol!

Me: Nah, its jack if you couldn't tell from my amazing wit


Then I was texting him while I was at work on Saturday about random ****, we often do this when we're bored at work with nothing to do

Me: How the hell do you view that how we met stuff anyway?

(I was randomly pissing around on facebook and decided we met on a trip to mt doom in summer of 93 or something and he went on to expand it, I was wondering how you viewed it once you accepted it)

Friend: Who and what.

Me: Our adventures to mt doom. On an unrelated note, one of the chefs at work sounds like hammer

Friend: Identify yourself or stop texting.

Me: It's jack you chump

Friend: Jack. Im not really gay.

At this point I realise I must have entered my friends number wrong into my new phone. I'm not sure if he was taking the adventure to mt doom as a sexual innuendo or just the fact a random person was texting him that made him think I was making a pass at him. I considered carrying on to mess with him but thought it best to just laugh my ass off all day.