Other Sooooo I slept with a good friend last night

In the eye? Surprisingly, no.

 

surely while leaning back "checking out" the wall of flesh?

 

I'm guessing that the 6 hours spent in A&E came from either her being on top and coming down not in the correct position, putting a big old kink in the thing or, you snapped your bango string?

 

Or she was heavy set (thing HEAVY SET), and you tried to pick her up? that's break your spine... but methinks 6 hours would be too short for that.

 

never ride anything you cant carry home

have the feeling its unrelated or something clumsy

 

haha i'm under a lot of pressure here!!

well it was the first time for both of us and it was Easter Monday 2006 (the easter monday part will become more important in just a moment) but her parents had just gone on holiday so we both knew that it was going to happen, but this had put some pressure on her and i was perhaps a bit too keen, so attempt one had gone badly and she had basically freaked out and tensed up... not in a good way.

so instead it had reverted back to the usual, which was everything but some full on sex. now, attempt one had involved a condom which i had since taken off (some of you may see where this is going). but now things were getting a bit more heated and with me not wanting to slow it down and her clearly now wanting it it was a case of just doing it and f*ck the consequences.

so cherries have been popped (i only lasted about a minute ) and bless her she said it wa "great" which i assume was an exaggeration of the truth. but now obviously the consequences of the unprotected fun times are beginning to dawn and the desire to get some form of morning after pill are at the top of the priorities list.

now remember it is Easter Monday and it is about half past 3 in the morning. turns out that NOWHERE is open on an easter monday, and i mean NOWHERE. we have: Asda, 2 Tescos, one Sainsbury's (which i work at) and some other smaller shops like Tesco Express etc

Plus Rep to anyone who can tell me where i Live from the above details...

but anyway none of these were open... soooooo... where else can you get the morning after pill? THATS RIGHT! it was A and E time! so we walk in a bit sheepish and i swear its the only time i've seen an accident and emergency department completely empty. the receptionist looks at us a bit odd as we both seem perfectly healthy, if a bit flustered. so we tell her the issue and she smiles and tells us to take a seat. an hour passes (no joke) and we get the scariest, oldest battleaxe take my ex into a side room and i'm left sitting there. at this point a male nurse walks through, sees me and briefly talks to the receptionist before turning to me and basically doing this:

so my ex comes out of the room and says we have to wait for the correct pill to be "made up", i didnt know they had to do this. we waited for 4 hours for the pill, which has 2 parts and were then told to go home. i suspect they make you wait so long to teach you a valuable lesson (it definitely works i can tell you).

on the plus side i had significant time to recover and had some really good sex when we got home (protected even under the effects of that pill ha!)

ok so i feel a bit guilty cos all you guys assumed i was horribly broken in some way from my first time (only mentally as it turned out) so as a pay off i'll give you a story for free:

my weirdest sexual experience, with the same girl as above, was on her living room floor. it started to get pretty heated and very loud which started to drive her pet dog loopy in the other room. it started to jump up at the door and managed to pull the door handle and burst into the room just as we were both "finishing up". it was too late for me to stop and at the worst possible moment it began to lick my feet. now... i can say that for the rest of the day i wrestled with myself over this, as i felt like a bit of a deviant, but... it did feel damn good

bad times! i split up with that girl the following year but we are still great friends...

hope you enjoyed guys, sorry it was an essay

 

thats seriously ****ed up mate.

 

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Awesome story...
As for the "One minute" bit -think Flight of the Conchords: "Two minutes in heaven is better than one minute in heaven".

 

I'm glad it just licked your feet and nothing else!

 

you could have kicked him away lol

hope you dont consider that a threesome

 

I have to say mjm25 - I am a bit disappointed. You insinuated that injuries would be involved! SHENANIGANS!

Still - props for enjoying the dog!

 

My guess is...

*looks at your "Location" tag*

...Kent, England!

 

You know, it's a fantastic coincidence, I was just logging on to start a thread about the 'friend zone' and whether you can sleep with friends or not.

I've given up on both remaining just friends with girls and on breaking out of the friend zone. Being friends with someone you're attracted to is just a pain in the arse, and the latter never happens. Well, evidently it does, but not for me. Maybe I have very stubborn female friends.

(Inb4 "or a very ugly face")

 

LOL
these days i have ugly female friends...

 

@ MaverickWill... that was cheating... you could have at least been nice and lied about your methods

@ BoiledElephant: the FZ isnt an issue if you don't hang about, or at least you won't be an FZ where people don't already know the score. i've got lots of female friends, i fancy a fair few of them, some of them like me too (but i'm in a relationship anyway) some of them i get absolutely no vibe from at all... but at least i'm not pining for people i have no chance with.

my advice is: flirt with who you like, if you get the vibe, you know your in there, if you don't, then let it go. in the future you might even find you got it wrong and they do like you, but then you haven't consciously lost out on anything at the time.

second: if you like someone, be mean, tease, poke fun, but be sincere. girls never go for the guys that obviously like them too much and are too sensitive to them. girls like to have fun, they like to flirt, and they like the chase as much as guys. have a bit of banter and you are guaranteed to at least be of interest to them, even if it doesnt go anywhere.

working at a supermarket with lots of guys and lots of girls means you see all the lovely guys who deserve to be with a nice girl get so worked up talking to the girls that they never get anywhere and the FZ smacks them in the face and all the guys who don't care are the ones who pull. i've found a happy medium, be nice but flirt horrendously even with the guys. it would be rude not to after all. if you can get away with saying "yalrite gorgeous" to your manager, you'll have no problem talking to the girls.

P.S. BoiledElephant if you make that thread then send me the link, i wanna see people's experiences! everyones had it, especially when they were too young to know better!

 

+1 for this... generally good avice

+2 for this.
Flirt with anything and everything. Women (in my experience) like a guy that's comfortable in situations. Don't be an ass about it, obviously (for example, some gay people don't like gay jokes being made around them). But in general, apply your brain and just go out and flirt. It's a great confidence booster as well...

 

true dat

women may say they want a man that in touch with his emotions etc etc, and im sure they do. but if you're too obvious from the start theres no fun in that now is there? if theres one thing i've learned its that girls like us for different reasons than we like them. often from a female perspective if she see's a fella in a certain way, that will be the start of an attraction, where as lets face it our attraction is fairly obvious to us immediately.

also, make em laugh. girls all agree they like a giggle and unlike us it seems to be directly connected to the attraction nerve endings. but dont make a clown of yourself, we want wit not slapstick.

 

I'm still reserving my high five until you report back after round two.

I've got to say, that story was a bit of a let-down. However, that's a good thing, b/c I really wasn't in the mood to hear about twisted/bent/snapped/broken equipment.

 

Get in.

btw, tags for this thread

 

Totally can, just might take a while to get there. You have to build up the confidence in the other person that it won't ruin the friendship usually though (providing they're not physically uninterested in you)