News Work for bit-tech and Custom PC

I thought the job requirements were a love of Cheesecake and Relix?!
I WAS LIED TO!

 

The full job ad on the corporate site:
Position open for minion / lacky / peasant worker
Must take orders well, make excellent tea and have all your own teeth.
Hours are likely to be long and unsociable for tuppence a fortnight and all the Arctic Silver you can eat.
...
Now you have to admit that is a tempting offer

 

I've met the man, and i can assure you, he's quite unique

I think i might actually give this some thought. Doing this for a living would be all 7 shades of awesome for me! One question though, does Dennis offer hazard compensation for Harry-Proximity?

 

That's actually a line in our company song, which we sing every morning before we start work.

 

The only thing stopping me applying is a complete lack of renumeration details........... any chance of a ball park figure?

 

This.

I'd love to go into tech journalism - I tend to love writing, despite the lack of time I get to do it.

Unfortunatly I live a fair bit from London, and although there is a direct route to London Victoria, transport costs aren't exactly going to be cheap

 

Agreed, it's a disgrace...

 

What's the Salary + bonuses?

 

Good luck to everyone applying. You'd be working with a fantastic team of people and getting your hands on *the* latest kit!

 

how come you guys are never looking for a "sit at home and play video games all day, and we will pay you gobs of money" position?

 

I'd be great at that

 

It's not a flag, it's a company, a high flying company, which will cheerfully work you to death, by the time you're old, your pension is sold, your cube will be your casket, it's a company, a high flying company, now please get back to work.

>.>

 

When you employ her - whoever she may be - she needs to be fit and non-geeky looking. Oh and she needs to be given articles about guns and rocket launchers ...

mmmmmmm!

 

WTF would a writer living in the 21st century need to actually be in London to write? Don't they mean a coffee fetcher/maker ?

 

Too bad I'm 17 and I live in Tamarac FL in the US which is over 3000 miles away

 

You have to be James' bitch and benchmark kit. He likes for his victims to be within cursing range.

This man knows his stuff.

 

I would (genuinely) love to apply for this. I'm not new to hardware reviews or writing news articles in general, and have been told (numerous ) times that I should have pursued a career in journalism or writing of some sort. I always take that as someone saying I'm a s**t engineer, even though I know it's intended as a compliment.

Anyway, unfortunately I have 2 years of my degree left, already have a job and am at the obvious disadvantage of being several hundred miles across the emerald sea, so I won't be applying. If something similar comes up in a few years time though, lookout! I might just go for it

I wish everyone who applies the best of luck. This is a great opportunity for an aspiring Journalist.

 

It means no naked people.

It'd probably be a better application of my time to go for this rather than finishing my one remaining year of uni, but for the last umpteen years I've done my level best to make the BiT staff hate me so perhaps not.

 

It would be helpful to make a decision if the salary was mentioned, considering this job's in London. Could you please post the salary on the corporate site?

 

How the hell do you fit five hundred words on top of a cheesecake? How about ten words and some nice candles instead?