So the other day I was at work, training two new members of staff how to use on of our systems. The training course was well underway, and having a little bit of a cold I kept having to quietly wipe my slightly runny nose. It was only when we stopped for lunch that I visited the gents, and was both horrified and mortified to see dried blood smeared all round my nostrils and across my cheek. Nothing serious, I'd just had a very small nosebleed - but in my wiping I'd somehow managed to smear it all over the place without realising No harm done, I made a joke about it after lunch and all is well. But why didn't one of them (or indeed any of the other eight colleagues in the room) feel the need to tell me I looked like a boxer after losing a particularly savage fight? Would you? Have you? I occasionally see ladies walking down the street with their skirts tucked into their knickers and other equally embarrassing public gaffes, but I realised that I actually very rarely speak up myself. I have held conversations with people who have a crusty bogey hanging out of their nose without batting an eyelid. People are funny.
I would have said so -- a nose bleed is an indicator that something is wrong that transgresses any boundaries of etiquette, I would say. With regards to bogies and the skirt/knickers thing, it would depend on the situation and person. I probably wouldn't go up to a woman in public and comment on that sort of thing, but if it was a friend having a conversation with a huge snotter dangling out of their beak I'd probably make fun of them in a light hearted way.
I fully agree, a nosebleed is not something I could ever keep quiet about, it's quite frankly ridiculous that everyone did for some reason
I've got no problem helping people avoid embarrassment. I'd rather someone tell me straight away. The worst thing I ever had to do, was tell a guy that his personal hygiene had to go up a notch, due to complaints of the smell from other employees. Poor guy.
My partner worked with a chap who had the same issue, damp smelling clothes, excessive sweating, horrendous turd-breath. Would have been bearable if he hadn't been a perv intent on invading everyone's personal space. Eventually his manager had the unenviable task of running through the list of hygiene complaints levied against him by various colleagues.
Personal hygeine is sometimes part of a contract/employee charter, particularly for people working with or around food.
It really isn't nice, for anyone. I felt like a total ass when speaking to him, and the look on his face was so sad to see. At the same time though, all I could think was "surely he must know, surely?" I mean, if you smell that bad, it must be detectable. It's like after having a hard session at the gym, or any intense physical activity. You notice after a while.
There are ways it has to be handled, but essentially, yes. If something anyone is doing has a negative effect on coworkers or the business, it can be addressed.
I think it's all dependant on the situation, in your case I would have personally said something, a nose bleed is not "unnattractive" like a bogey nor embarrassing. As for my own experiences, I work in retail as a sales assistant and I'd say a high percentage of our customers are 50+ A lot of which dribble, have numerous dangling bogeys, weepy/gunky eyes etc. It would be completely unprofessional to mention it, but I've had things mentioned to me before from customers, food in my teeth when I get back from lunch break or that yellow stuff in the corner of your eye if I get up late for work
I would have said somthing like The next time you look at me like that it wont just be your nose I make bleed. No seriously I would give a gentle hint you seem to have a nose bleed.
A nose bleed? Of course, I'd say something in the nicest possible way to you. A girl with an embarassing clothing malfunction... not so much! A friend had a top on inside out when she came to collect before we went out one night, so I told her straight away - and in her defence, it was a top that looked very similar no matter which way it was worn. She thanked me and we had a laugh about it, but if it was someone I didn't know, I don't think I could bring myself to tell them!
I think most people would say something, although if they were new and they saw you kept dabbing at it maybe they thought you were aware of it? It all depends on the situation though, if that was someone walking down the street, and you have maybe 10 seconds of "contact" then I doubt anyone would. Same way if someone has a clothing malfunction, if they are a "random" it's going to be very awkward to tell them.
Ali (my OH) told me last week that she had walked half a mile through town with her shirt unbuttoned down to the navel - only realised when she got to work. A lot of men in Salisbury probably had a better start to their days than normal that morning Good for her though, she took it in stride!
yeah not an easy call on the clothing thing but definately would alert the person to a nose bleed as It could be more serious than it looks better to err on the side of caution
That's what I'd have done too. In fact, that's the exact face I made at myself in the mirror, only I am of course 1000 times more handsome than the chap in that photo.
Just out of curiosity, I see people have said no to telling a complete stranger something they have no trouble telling a friend, despite it being equally as embarrassing. I wonder what the psychological difference is? I mean why wouldn't we tell a stranger there is a problem? Are we frightened of being rebuffed, attacked or just lack the social confidence to do something like that?
I think its probably to do with awkwardness vs amount of time around the individual. If it was at a party and there was a random there, I would tell them. If I am just walking by and will never meet the person again.. I probably wouldnt... I guess its a sense of obligation and the trade of between the social awkwardness. Its only awkward because we think it should be though... most people laugh it off.
