LOL Mornington Crescent

I know all other players haven't gone yet, but I'm just going to sneak in there and do my next move in advance, because this game proceeds in fits and starts.

Assuming nobody uses triple reflex in this round, I'd like to use my Jehovah's Witness bonus. It's before noon and we're ignoring the 1982 bridge modifications, so this leaves me on Coventry Street.

 

Nearly two years it's taken to pick up every leaf from Elm Park to Seven Sisters. Such is the punishment though, for flouting Major & Major's third rule of two thumbs (never stand on one foot, holding a bunch of grapes whilst underwater).

Trying my luck, I pick up a Community Chest card. Well, this is awkward. I have to collect each player's Grandma from bingo.

Onward to Tooting Broadway it is then!

 

Holy crap, it's been a while. Think I've missed my my turn enough times to get a purple bonus card.

Apparently I can now move straight to Victoria. I think there is now hope of me not losing the game.

 

Well, I'm still on Conventry street until this round is concluded, but due to the time that's elapsed I receive an 8-point bonus*. The remaining players who haven't died or left the forum, please finish the round so I can use them. I've got my eye on Wardour.

*Harwood & Pilche, 2nd ed., pp.45-60

 

I believe that Mankz left for a brief period. Pretty sure that counts...

No bonus for you

 

Has the new crossrail strategic overlay superceded the postwar limitations rule yet?

 

Can I interject and play the lesser-known prefecture adjudication (reversed and doubly rescinded) card first played during a now infamous and schism creating game of Mornington Crescent by Scrimnagle & Perkins.

After considering the previous positions and adjusting for the windspeeds over the intervening hours since the first playing of this controversial move - since ratified by the ICMCAC (International Convention of Mornington Crescent Associations and Conclaves see minutes of the 1977 meeting page 201 paragraph b section 4a part v) - I believe this places me at Abbey Road

 

Only if:
a) the wind speed, corrected thereof, is either
i) -3mph
ii) the return speed of a curiously shaped beard

Or

b) as recorded by Plymouth in the 1987 lounge game for the under 60's, a thrown plimsoll lands squarely inside the circumference of a Victoria sponge.

These additions were hurriedly made after Perkins tripped over a rug and sent a priceless first edition copy of "Dandy Men's Wild Adventures" into the hands of the enemy. You'll find them recorded as a sub note in the column of page 2 in Froodlittle & Desserts 1999 edition.

 

b) was made void because it turned out the plimsoll was actually a prototype flip-flop, and they were banned at the gentlemen's club in question in '85, after that incident which we aren't supposed to talk about.

(If you want to know more, goto the Cumberland Arms on Jewry Street after 6pm on Tuesdays, and ask the Landlord "do you think pickled eggs should be vetoed whilst playing Mornington Crescent".)

 

Ah well spotted, that's some keen knowledge you have there, most commendable. It has, however brought back painful memories of a large jar of pickled eggs and a locked room.

Stamp licked, I've to stay at Hampstead Heath for two turns and a knuckle.

 

Dammit - I'd failed to remember that particular addendum to the previous rule change. I now have to stay at Marble Arch with 3 bags of turnips and a bowler hat.

Well played sirs.

 

Time for my "Random Roll Ahead of Christmas" with the multi dice. It's given me a 45.5 B, which I think puts me at Monument, providing my Hohmann transfer calculations were correct. (See what I did there KSP fans?)

 

We're allowing Hohmann transfers, but no doubt you're aware that they carry a fixed penalty? Two slates per round for three rounds. I'm sorry to point it out, but I don't make the rules.

And while we're clarifying the basics,

No. Transport amendments and updates cannot supercede rules implemented more than 10 years ago without an official published update from Boris Johnson, and he's busy waterskiing at the moment.

 

I'll be honest. I thought I was going to slip that one in with no-one noticing. (that's what she said, wheeeey).

But seriously, that sucks. I'll go dig up some slates.

 

I've just reread through this thread and discovered that everybody has missed the massive opportunity that Turgenev's Validation gives us! I'm going to make the most of this opportunity (which lasts until 14:37 today) to catapult myself (literally) to Paddington just in time to catch the train to Edgeware Road before my Queen of Jacks expires.

Julianmartin, I'd just like to draw your attention to the Lewd Jokes Addendum (specifically rule 5318008) which specifically states that any player invoking the "That's what she said" line forfeits any tokens they may have accrued and are forced to start again at Uxbridge.

Given that this is your first infraction, though, I'll be lenient with you and send you to Rayners Lane instead. You still have to find those slates though.

 

I've just dug up my first of three slates required. Rayners lane is just fine by me, plays in to my hands beautifully as I've been waiting to use my RMT Union Strike card to invoke a 3 minute standstill on the board - this allows me to find my other two slates without the torsional forces induced by other player movement. I defer to the next player.

 

Since we're only just in the beginning[1] of the game I'd like to use the Latecomer's Rule[2] to join in, if no one objects.

I immediately use the trap card I received at the start and put it on the second lower square on the right of the playing field[3]. I upgrade my bank, invade Indonesia, build two hotels and divide half of my tokens between them[4]. The leftover tokens I place on the trap card... (hint: the next person to draw a Queen of Spades will not be happy... )
I start the St. Ignatius pattern but set it to the colour purple[5], avoiding the obvious pitfalls this strategy usually has[6] and end up on Baker Street.

My style is defensive, but quite modern, as you can probably tell...

[1] Using the definition of Fredrickson's Concise Rulebook of Mornington Crescent (1976), p.21 if I remember correctly
[2] Additions and Strategies 2001 by Edward Miese, Addendum B, p.XXIX
[3] A strategy I picked up from a rare little book called Ponderings of a Grandmaster, by Klosiewicz (1913)
[4] Achieving Economic Victory in Mornington Crescent Rev.2 by Dijkstra (2003), basically the whole second chapter is about this.
[5] Got that one from GameFAQs, we'll see how it goes...
[6] Famous Counter-Strategies by Smith and Welles (1999)

 

A truly outstanding start, well done chap.

I'm going for an ordinary plus 9 roll as suggested by Bryon et al in 1999's fantastic hardback edition of "Morning Crescent before Sunday Lunch, the do and do not manoeuvres to prevent gastrointestinal evacuation from acute Crescent induced surprise". Chapter 19 (Do dairy based goods improve cloaking on the Jubiley Line [sic] AND stave off gastroesophegal reflux) is a real favourite of mine to read in bed.

I do believe I have arrived at Westminster.