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News Duke Nukem Forever Review

Discussion in 'Article Discussion' started by CardJoe, 13 Jun 2011.

  1. leslie

    leslie Just me!

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    Even had this been released several years ago, it would have flopped. There was simply no way to live up to the hype, but at least you could grant it some leeway.

    At this point it's beyond that as well.
    It's old, outdated, over hyped, the failures along the way were well documented... Did anyone really expect a great game from it at this point?
     
  2. Toploaded

    Toploaded What's a Dremel?

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    I did, and that's what I got :)
     
  3. Hovis

    Hovis What's a Dremel?

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    It isn't. Deal with it. Just because you've bought and paid for it (presumably), just because you -like- it, doesn't make it good. I can think of literally dozens of reasons, objectively, why DNF is a complete turd of a game. If we move onto the subjective reasons why it sucks, I could be here all week.

    Frankly it's not just bad, it's a sincere contender for being among the worst FPS games of all time. And the funny thing is that it could have come out five years ago, even ten years ago, in its current state, and it still would have been complete toss. Crap levels. Crap baddies. Crap weapons. Crap controls. Crap graphics. Crap animations. Crap story. Crap characters. Crap dialogue. Crap jokes. Crap sound. Crap music. Crap loading screen. Crap menu system. Crap price point. Crap multiplayer. Crap. Crap. Crap. Not one single element of the game has been delivered to a standard that I would consider fit for purpose. If this game were a person I would beat it to death in front of witnesses and serve every day of my prison sentence with a smile upon my face as I thought about what I'd done.

    Don't take it personal. I don't hate the player, in this case more than almost any other, I hate the game.
     
  4. Toploaded

    Toploaded What's a Dremel?

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    lol

    There are dozens of reasons it's damn good fun and indeed, a good entertaining video game, be it released now or 10 years ago. Considering how seriously you have taken this issue it's pretty obvious why someone like yourself would dislike a game like this quite so much :) It's not like I (and I assume others) don't appreciate more serious and polished games that I assume would fit your criteria for being 'fit for purpose', my other favorite release of the year so far has been The Wither 2.

    I fully understand why some don't like it, but it's amusing to see so many unable to comprehend that others think it's great.
     
  5. AlienwareAndy

    AlienwareAndy What's a Dremel?

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    But other than that you really liked it?

    Congratulations BTW. You are the most miserable whiney cynical person I have ever seen on the internet. And that's really saying something.
     
  6. SexyHyde

    SexyHyde Minimodder

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    I'll definitly be getting this when the price drops to £10-15. It was never going to be duke 3d 2.0, although most were expecting it. Considering all the shackles and baggage this game has the 50% review and 50/50 marmite response actually seems ok.
     
  7. CrapBag

    CrapBag Multimodder

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    Wow you used the word crap 19 times that definitely means I won't buy the game now. :wallbash:

    Hell every post I make involves the word crap (username) and yet you still seem over the top :)
     
  8. wafflesomd

    wafflesomd What's a Dremel?

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    It was everything I expected. A simple mindless shooter with some duke humor. I thought it was grea


    I guess that makes two of us.

    Meanwhile the rest of the gaming world takes itself entirely too seriously.
     
  9. slothy89

    slothy89 MicroModder

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    I'm only 22 and played DN3D when I was maybe 12.. Just because we weren't old enough to play it when it was released doesn't mean we didn't at all.

    I'm not surprised by this review really.. Everyone had their hopes up for something epic, but after 14-15 years, you wonder what they are actually doing? Maybe they all got obsessed in the dream level and 10years later thought oh crap! We havnt released this yet!
     
  10. BRAWL

    BRAWL Dead and buried.

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    3 of us... Duke Nukem Forever was friggin hilarious. It was exactly what I expected... oh and the shotgun once again kicks allmighty ass on there. Shotgun and RPG and I'm a happy Brawl-cannon.

    With Halo/CoD/BF since the DN:F hilarity began back in 1997... The game was expected to get slated. But I say this quite confidently... the only people who have a valid opinion of this game, are those who actually understand the mentality of "Oh aliens... CHAINGUNNNN MOTHERRRRFUUDDGERRSS!" because that's how the game is designed... little more than a slug-fest!
     
  11. AlienwareAndy

    AlienwareAndy What's a Dremel?

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    No, no they didn't.

    And those are the ones who are really enjoying it.
     
  12. Apocalypso

    Apocalypso Fully armed and operational.

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    Speaks volumes.
     
  13. David

    David μoʍ ɼouმ qᴉq λon ƨbԍuq ϝʁλᴉuმ ϝo ʁԍɑq ϝμᴉƨ

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    Sooo... you like it then, yes?

    Stop beating about the bush, man. Spit it out; say what you mean, for goodness sake. All this sitting on the fence will leave you with some nasty splinters. :lol:
     
  14. V3ctor

    V3ctor Tech addict...

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    Exactly... Just look at the game as a DN3D with better graphics, not so complex in levels, but it's a fun game, I really like it
     
  15. Bauul

    Bauul Sir Bongaminge

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    As it happens I'm really taking my time with it, and so far it's paying off.

    Just done the Hive levels, and in all honesty I haven't played a level like that since Half-Life 2: Ep 1. And you know what? I rather miss them!
     
  16. modfx

    modfx Loft Gremlin

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    That would be incredible, good a group tales it upon themselves to, infact is pay for a modded fixed version XD
     
  17. faugusztin

    faugusztin I *am* the guy with two left hands

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    Well, Duke is a lot more fun than Crysis 2. Crysis 2 got 8/10, Duke got 50%. Yeah, right.

    PS: I did read elsewhere some people complaining about loading times. No idea what are they talking about, every load took on my PC exactly 6 seconds.
     
  18. Pete J

    Pete J Employed scum

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    Have to disagree with you there! But hey, if you enjoyed Duke then that's fine with me.
     
  19. Eiffie

    Eiffie What's a Dremel?

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    After playing for a solid 6 hours last night. . . yea it's not a great game but it is friggin hilarious when it comes to the jokes and such. Maybe duke should do stand-up?
     
  20. wafflesomd

    wafflesomd What's a Dremel?

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    Agreed. Crysis 2 was a generic bore fest.

    What happened to games like Conkers Bad Fur Day and the likes. It's like every game today has to be hyper realistic and have an overall serious tone.
     
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