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LOL Just For Laughs. Jokes & Gags

Discussion in 'General' started by Arthur, 19 Oct 2015.

  1. Kronos

    Kronos Well-Known Member

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    Will the newly released T2 Trainspotting be as big a disappointment to railway enthusiasts as the original film?
     
  2. Arthur

    Arthur Comment is over there ----->

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    My father worked as a highways maintenance engineer fixing up the UK's roads for over 50 years.

    Found out the other day that he had been stealing from work for most of that time.....I went round to see him.....

    The signs were all there !
     
  3. ElThomsono

    ElThomsono Well-Known Member

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    I was reading a really good book about how they used to build ships, it was... riveting!
     
  4. Arthur

    Arthur Comment is over there ----->

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    Two Irish fellas were walking down the road when they stumbled upon a paramedic giving first aid to a bloke who was lying next to a crashed motorcycle.

    "what's up with him ?" asked O'Reilly

    The paramedic looked up and said...

    "He's got 2 broken collar bones, 2 dislocated knees, a broken right arm, broken left ankle and 2 broken thumbs"

    "Geez" said Mick....no wonder he fell off !
     
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  5. wufer

    wufer Member

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    I used to be a werewolf.

    But im all right nawwwwwwooooooooooooooo
     
  6. Arthur

    Arthur Comment is over there ----->

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    Just read a survey that says one in ten of your friends have a secret gambling addiction...

    My money's on Mike !!!
     
  7. Arthur

    Arthur Comment is over there ----->

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    Paddy takes a chainsaw back to the shop and complains that he was told it could easily cut down 60 trees a day.

    He moans to the shop assistant that he has only managed to cut down 40 trees on his best day.

    The shop assistant agrees to have a look at the chainsaw to see if there's any fault.

    He stands back and pulls the cord and starts revving up the saw......

    Paddy asks "what's that noise" ?
     
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  8. Behemoth

    Behemoth Timelord in training

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    I was stopped in town on the way to work today by a group of feminists. They wanted to know how I viewed Lesbian relationships in the modern world today.

    Apparently, in high definition wasn't the answer they were looking for.
     
  9. IamJudd

    IamJudd Well-Known Member

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    I can't not hear it every time i see reference to Nvidia...[​IMG]

    So I did this...

    Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
     
  10. Arthur

    Arthur Comment is over there ----->

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    Son : Dad.....why is my sister called Teresa ?

    Dad : Because your mother absolutely loves Easter son and Teresa is an anagram of Easter.

    Son : Ah ok, thanks Dad.

    Dad : No worries Alan.
     
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  11. Arthur

    Arthur Comment is over there ----->

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    Went to a fancy dress party last night, dressed as a loaf of bread....

    Was fighting the birds off me all night.
     
  12. Arboreal

    Arboreal Well-Known Member

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    In reply to Arthur's Dad joke above. This is far more appropriate for Bit-Tech.
    THIS IS BIT-TECH

    [​IMG]

    Why you'd have a low power i7 as you fave escapes me though ;)
     
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  13. B1GBUD

    B1GBUD ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Accidentally Funny

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    And joypads.....:duh: KB+M=Cheesecake :rock:
     
  14. Yadda

    Yadda Well-Known Member

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    What do you call a rabbit with a deformed penis?

    F**ks Funny.

    *Boom-tish!*

    :D
     
  15. Kronos

    Kronos Well-Known Member

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  16. Vault-Tec

    Vault-Tec Green Plastic Watering Can

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    Brilliant :D
     
  17. Kronos

    Kronos Well-Known Member

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  18. legoman

    legoman breaker of things

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    An entire city in has gone missing in Yorkshire.


    Police are looking for Leeds

    *Groan*
     
  19. Kronos

    Kronos Well-Known Member

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    Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?
    They're really good at it.:grin:
     
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  20. MeMo

    MeMo It is what it is

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    Oh haha funny
     

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