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News MI6 hackers replace bomb recipes with cake recipes

Discussion in 'Article Discussion' started by CardJoe, 3 Jun 2011.

  1. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    I can see it now...

    When Mohammad al-Jafir, a disgruntled college drop-out in Sparkbrook logged on to al-Awlaki and Khan's extremist Muslim website, he had an ephiphany.

    "It was one of those religious, bolt-out-of-the-blue religious experiences you hear about", he told our reporter doday. "Suddenly, I understood my purpose in life. I understood what Allah wanted me to do."

    That day, al-Jafir became a convert. He had a calling. From now on, he would singlemindedly focus his entire existence on that one shining goal: to become a baker.

    "To make something so delicious from just a bit of flour, water, eggs and sugar... to create a delicate masterpiece that lights up people's faces and makes their day just that little bit better... to be able to affect people's lives at such a fundamental level... that is the most powerful rush you can imagine. You feel like the hand of God.

    Since he enrolled in the NVQ-2 for pastry chefs, al-Jafir has been converting the masses in his own unique attempt. He spreads leaflets with cake recipes for beginners. He hands out baklava at the local mosque, and preaches the delight of good food and the noble act of feeding the hungry. He randomly leaves boxes of cupcakes on buses and park benches. He goes to Muslim schools and teaches baking. His feeling is that such purposeful and pleasurable creative activities may give students a new insight into Islam. "Ours is a culture of sweets and pastry, good coffee and tea going back millennia", he says. My belief is that Allah wants us to sample and enjoy the foods He has created for us." Man's purpose is to make food, not war. Eat, pray, love. That's my motto".

    His young customers at the mosque seem to agree. "In the past we used to fight with the local White Brits. But when you have had some of those delicious cakes, and you are all mellowed out by the sugar and carbohydrates, well, you discover that those Brits have some really rather good cake recipes. And the Hindus, they really understand their sweets. So now we exchange recipes, teach each other how to make baklava, battenberg cake, profiteroles, Arab honey cake... Life's too short to argue. There's too much baking and eating to do."
     
    Last edited: 4 Jun 2011
    theflatworm, Pliqu3011 and Waynio like this.
  2. Waynio

    Waynio Relaxing

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    LMAO beatiful :D +rep Nexxo :clap: classic :D.
     
  3. HourBeforeDawn

    HourBeforeDawn a.k.a KazeModz

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    we are not against their religion thats why, we are against the terrorist cells.
     
  4. Rich_13

    Rich_13 What's a Dremel?

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    I think they are hiring at the moment actually.. I'm sure I saw something in my inbox recently. :thumb:
     
  5. sp4nky

    sp4nky BF3: Aardfrith WoT: McGubbins

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    I know someone that often bakes cupcakes and brings them to work. Does this mean she's a terrorist?
     
  6. NiHiLiST

    NiHiLiST New-born car whore

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    After lighting the candle does she run behind cover?
     
  7. GravitySmacked

    GravitySmacked Mostly Harmless

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    Did she download the recipe from that website?
     
  8. Anuskasvo

    Anuskasvo What's a Dremel?

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    Silly and boring.
     
  9. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    Terrorism always is. That's why MI6 thought they might bring some excitement to their lives with the more productive pursuit of making cupcakes. :D
     
    dark_avenger likes this.
  10. LordPyrinc

    LordPyrinc Legomaniac

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    This is exactly the type of thing more hackers should get involved in. Go after the websites run by groups that promote violence.

    Major kudos to MI6!
     
  11. leslie

    leslie Just me!

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    They should have done it more stealth-like.

    Not relabel pages or anything, just bits and pieces. That way at a glance everything seems normal. It would take longer for them to notice, possibly giving them a chance to keep changing it without them knowing, but also, you could discredit them for failed recipes and such, making them look like idiots.

    Still awesome though. :)
     
  12. thehippoz

    thehippoz What's a Dremel?

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    probably running unpatched like sony.. be funny if it was a social engineered exploit.. I could see the guy clicking on the link then saying I rub it and you do it

    guy at mi6 migrates and says yes you do xD I bet they found all sorts of things in that network, like porn
     
  13. Elton

    Elton Officially a Whisky Nerd

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    now that is genius.
     
  14. Jake123456

    Jake123456 Surprise!

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    >_>


    Its bloody brilliant, its great to know us Brits still have a sense of humour ;)
     
  15. azazel1024

    azazel1024 What's a Dremel?

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    So...if I google "cupcake recipes" is this going to come to the top of the search results? Are they superior to recipes.com recipes? Inquiring minds want to know.

    Another important question, is the FBI going to start tracking purchases of large quantities of flour, sugar or butter? I can see the inditement handed down now...

    "John Doe is accused of purchasing a used 1996 Ford Econoline van, 500lbs enriched flour, 800lbs refined cane sugar, 50lbs Chocolate icing, 80lbs salted butter, 3lbs baking soda and 1 pack trick candles (to ensure the bomb squad could not extinguish them once they were lit)."
     
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