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Rant Possibly the greatest crisis man has ever faced!

Discussion in 'General' started by Cheapskate, 29 Dec 2010.

  1. Cheapskate

    Cheapskate Insane? or just stupid?

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    So earlier in the year while restocking on toilet paper, I noticed the packaging said, "Bigger rolls!" -etc... At the time I also noticed the rolls were exactly 1/2" thinner than the old rolls. After a recent re-stock I noticed something even more troubling...
    [​IMG]
    The made the cardboard roller fatter now too.
    So how long do we have before a full roll can be wiped out by a single bad chili session?

    This is the kind of stuff wars were started over!
     
    Kylevdm likes this.
  2. Weekly_Estimate

    Weekly_Estimate Random bird noises.

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    Only in America.

    [​IMG]
     
  3. talladega

    talladega I'm Squidward

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    the TP roll test is now invalid! ahhhh
     
  4. supermonkey

    supermonkey Deal with it

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    Not sure where you're going with that. Are you suggesting that only in America would someone write a sarcastic rant about the size of toilet paper?
     
  5. Gunsmith

    Gunsmith Maximum Win

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    i thought American TP was infact hundreds of towels wrapped around a barrel.

    are you telling me this is not so?
     
  6. Wicked_Sludge

    Wicked_Sludge My eyes! The goggles do nothing!

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    dont be daft.

    we use dozens of baby pandas rubber banded together and wrapped around a diamond dispenser.

    whilst sitting atop a gold encrusted climate controlled toilet seat.

    and listening to 7.1 dolby digital surround sound and watching HD movies on a 52" plasma TV.

    and bombing random countries for more oil.

    srsly :blah:
     
  7. TheMusician

    TheMusician Audio/Tech Enthusiast/Historian

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    Well in my bathroom, I just have a mirror. But it's not really a mirror. It's a 52" plasma TV with a small HD camera next to it so it acts as a mirror. I like seeing my reflection in HD. (ironically it'd probably be pretty damn blurry)
     
  8. Smilodon

    Smilodon The Antagonist

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    I have a HD mirror. It never show anything interesting, though... :(
     
  9. Sloth

    Sloth #yolo #swag

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    If toilet paper related issues are "Only in America" then I question your hygiene :eeek:
     
  10. Silver51

    Silver51 I cast flare!

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    Wait, is that the bog roll with moisturiser in it? Seriously, of all the places to wipe Aloe Vera scented petrochemicals, your black hole isn't one of them. I'm not sure who in the dunny parchment business thought that Turtle Waxing your chocolate whizzway was a good idea.

    Also, as each individual square of thunder paper gets thicker (I guess that's what they're advertising,) it feels more like using a rolled up copy of the Guardian to beat back any Klingons. Personally I'd go for the cheap, regular stuff and double up to avoid breaching the poo paper.
     
  11. Cheapskate

    Cheapskate Insane? or just stupid?

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    At $20 a pound, TP could potentially replace the gold standard.





    (Yes. I pulled that number... out of my butt.:p)

    And, no Silver, I can't afford the 'slimy' wipes.
     
  12. The_Beast

    The_Beast I like wood ಠ_ಠ

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    Don't eat chili.......problemo solved
     
  13. Chr!s

    Chr!s What's a Dremel?

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    Never understood why loo rolls even need a cardboard inner.
     
  14. mjm25

    mjm25 What's a Dremel?

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    This is why the English language is the besterest (intended irony)

    You sir, are a scribe. +rep
     
  15. Wicked_Sludge

    Wicked_Sludge My eyes! The goggles do nothing!

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    lulz were had. rep was given :lol:
     
  16. Psycho

    Psycho Average

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    Use sand paper, problem solved.
     
  17. Guest-23315

    Guest-23315 Guest

    OH NOES.
     
  18. jhanlon303

    jhanlon303 The Keeper of History

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    +rep for this. This will end up in somebody's sig for sure. Might even be mine!
     
  19. Pieface

    Pieface Modder

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  20. DeadP1xels

    DeadP1xels Social distancing since 92

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    We're too hardcore for toilet paper

    We use are barehands then sit down and chomp on a live pig



    None of this crumpets and tea la-dee-da :thumb:
     

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