George, thank you. This feels a really positive thing to do, and for the Forum to help make a difference. IMHO it will say so much more than a wreath could.
A bad schedule and a busted fender seems to be all he mentioned recently that could have got him down. Has anyone else noticed any signs going further back he was having problems? I'd like to think that if he'd asked the community for help, the response online and off would have been overwhelmingly positive. In any event, RIP kid; my condolences to you and your family David.
I surely didn't notice anything deadly serious. He did seem to be rather on edge about College and he was posting in the Drinking thread too. A lot of the seriously disturbed and depressed of us tend not to show our weakness to many people, they don't want everybody to know. That could've been his case, we didn't know because he didn't tell us; on the internet we can't tell anything by body language or speech tones, we only have the written word to go by. For all we know he probably had some very serious problems that he was keeping under lock and key. I don't think speculation helps though, what matters is that it is a very sad time for his family.
This came completely out of the blue to me. A very sad time for his family and the forum to lose such a great person at so young an age.
No, but forum posts are only a tiny glimpse on a person's life and thoughts. It is a little-known statistic that a mental health professional will lose about two patients to suicide every three years. I've been lucky myself and never lost anyone in the seven years I worked at the front line of community mental health. But that was just luck-- I did have one patient make a serious attempt. So if seasoned mental health professionals cannot always spot the warning signs, what chance do ordinary people have? That's because often there are no warning signs. Those who seriously contemplate suicide hide it carefully lest they are stopped. For others it is an impulsive act in response to overwhelming feelings of depression or despair. Suicide is an emotional act so for an outsider it is hard to understand. When confronted with a tragedy, we experience grief. We go from denial and shock ("How could this have happened?") to anger and/or guilt in which we blame others, the victim or ourselves, to bargaining, in which we try to redeem the situation retrospectively, to a sense of powerlessness as the awful, immutable reality dawns on us. Eventually we reach acknowledgement and learn to come to terms with the loss. It is natural that we all now ask ourselves how and why; look for signs, causes, what we could have done differently had we known. We want to think we could have helped him. But such fantasies are unhelpful for ourselves and for his family. All we can do is honour his memory in a way that is meaningful to them.
We can always count on trusty Nexxo to put a psychological insight onto something like this. It's true that we can speculate the how's and why of it all, but I think it just makes everybody feel worse, right?
It confronts us with our powerlessness in the face of tragedy. But speculation just gives us an illusion that we could have known, and that we could have done something if we had. Thus we move from a sense of powerlessness to a sense of failure. Not really an improvement.
Bloody hell, I came to this part of the forum to add a comment to another subject and this thread hit me right away. I hoped it was a joke, sadly it was not. I had some personal dealings with Allessando via the Marketplace and although I cannot claim to know the guy he stuck me as a very genuine person. I am deeply saddened to read of his passing and my condolences go out to his family.
I used to work for my local Mind charity, and now find myself a client of theirs (working for wellbeing). They are a fantastic charity who do vital work for the community. Very pleased to see that is where the donations will be going.
Being one of the few members who has actually met Alessandro (and his grandfather) in real life, I feel the tragedy of this situation particularly deeply. Kidmod invited me into his own home, made me feel welcome and took me through his scratchbuild and hardware. Whilst I can hardly say I knew him from our brief meeting that day and our online interactions, I can safely say that a light has gone out with his passing. I suspect Alessandro would have gone on to great things, with his somewhat entrepreneurial mind set and love of there finer things at such a young age. Those traits coupled with a wicked, dry sense of humour and a genuine passion for the things that he loved mean that he will be missed not only on here, but I'm sure by everyone whose lives he touched in his relatively short time with us. Of course, it is to his family that my most sincere condolences go. Again, I have met most of you albeit briefly, and you seemed like such genuine, kind-hearted people. Nobody deserves to lose a loved-one so young and whilst I know you'll be strong please know that you are in very many people's thoughts. I have in the recent past lost a close family member to suicide and it cuts to the core, but time is greatest healer. I think the donations to Mind are a really fantastic idea, if only to ensure that his passing has a tangible positive impact on some others who are wrestling with their own internal turmoil. Peace.
Sadly I didn't really know the lad. But I alway's noticed how polite and friendly he was in his post's, and he came accross as a happy go lucky young lad. I do not envy the sheer amount pressure the youth of today are under (God i sound old) with education costs and job prospects and housing etc. RIP Alessandro. The forum shines a little less brighter without you.
I didn't know him in person, but I lost my sister to suicide not too long ago. I so know the pain and distress it creates. My thoughts are with his family and his friends. As mentioned, time will be the greatest healer. Rest in peace young Kidmod.
Well this completely sux, please can you pass on condolences to the family for me George. How about a fitting tribute from bit-tech, maybe we could have a "kidmod" forum rank? Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk
Good night sweet prince may the flights of angels sing thee to thy rest your be greatly missed KidMod condolences to the family
