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Redundancy – kapow

Discussion in 'Serious' started by AndyDEL, 11 Jan 2009.

  1. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    I really do sympathise with you (it is you we're talking about, right? Because if it is not, consider your contribution deleted), but if one thing is worse than sounding like a dick, it is sounding like a bitter dick.

    Shall we talk about terminal cancer? I can get you in touch with a young guy who is about to leave his wife and three-year old son behind. You're contemplating suicide --he just wants to live. Care to swap?

    Just as there are always people worse off than AndyDEL, there will always be people worse off than you. There are a whole bunch of them having a bitch of a time in Darfur and Gaza for instance. This is not to make light of your personal misery, but it's a bit conceited to think that you have the lease to all suffering. That's sort of thinking won't help you get out of the rut you are in.

    There's always a job. Not a great paying job perhaps, not something that you could with any stretch of the imagination call a career, but there's always something that earns you at least some money to get you through until you get something better. Three years? Possibly you could have re-trained in a needed skill during that time.

    Now before you punch the reply button and rightly argue that it is easy for me to say that, who doesn't know jack about your complex circumstances which may well have prevented you from finding a job or re-training for another, consider that you don't know jack about AndyDEL's circumstances either (or mine, for that matter --you think I was born in my job?). We all have crap going on. And since we're all relatively privilliged to be alive, we've yet got more crap coming to us. Time to deal, bro.

    Because a few of us don't. Theirs is the crap that ends all crap. They have no more choices, no hope, no mercy. At least your life is still yours for the taking.

    I moved to Hull for my first job (to be fair, I didn't know what it was like then, but if I had to again in order to have a job, I would), and I moved to Birmingham for my second. Hey, after Hull I thought it was an improvement. :p

    Now you're talking. If I had my time over again, that's what I'd do. :D
     
    boiled_elephant likes this.
  2. boiled_elephant

    boiled_elephant Merom Celeron 4 lyfe

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    WHAT?! Oh, come on, even I'm not that unlucky in my example-choosing! You must be joking D:
     
  3. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    Nope, 'tis true.
     
  4. Red 5

    Red 5 What's a Dremel?

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    What irked me so much is that most people who stub their toe don't offer themselves as a tale of hope for those who've lost a leg. My intention wasn't to out do him or seek sympathy for myself, only to bring to light that it was only a stub.

    For the record, I've now been back in work for over a year, but wouldn't dream of telling a paraplegic that all I had to do was walk it off.

    I have no requirement to debate further.
     
  5. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    Not so fast, buster, because what irks me is people who have their paddy and run. AndyDEL's intention was not to tell people to cheer up, worse things happen at sea. On the contrary:

    What he is saying that even three months of unemployment, with all its uncertainties about the future and how you are going to look after you and yours, leaves a lasting traumatising impression. You should be able to relate. You obviously do, because your tantrum appears to me to have stirred echos of your own traumatic experience. But instead of making a connection with him, you lambast AndyDEL for quite simply not having suffered as much as you have. Well I can tell you stories of real people that top yours in spades, and then some.

    Sorry, but it is really hard to sympathise with someone who acts like a bitter dick.
     
  6. AndyDEL

    AndyDEL What's a Dremel?

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    You were out of work for three years... Unless you have a disability or have some deep social phobia.. I've really got no sympathy for you...

    If i hadn't gotten a job by January, i was going to do bar work / factory work / anything to not eat through my savings and support myself and my wife... I refuse to believe you couldn't find something like that aslong as able... Sure, it would of been a slap in the face to do it, but you graft. There is always a job, not a good job. So 'diddums'. As said before however, if you had a genuine reason then.. Ouch, feel for you.

    As Nexxo said.. You look around hard enough, you'll always find someone else going through a rougher time than yourself. Doesn't mean that the experiences you face aren't hard..

    Ironically.. You mention someone losing a leg... I spent over a year in a wheelchair / crutchs with the real possibility of never being able to walk again after a nasty injury... That was NOTHING compared to the stress i felt when being redundant for 3 months, i'd rather of gone through all that rehab again than gone through that. Showing that for me personally and im sure others, redundancy and uncertainy of your future is one of the most gut wrenching thing i've ever been through.
     
  7. Red 5

    Red 5 What's a Dremel?

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    :sigh: Very well.

    Now to 'the message'.

    Apart from that one paragraph you quote, the message I was getting at the end was that everything is now fantastic and wonderful and he's sure that anyone else put out of work at this time will be able to bounce back in a similar time frame and you just have to keep on hoping. About the only thing missing in my mind was "trust in the Lord and he will provide". The use of my personal circumstances was purely to illustrate that I know this to be untrue, that not everyone is going to bounce back in a similar time frame and as such I thought his post was incredibly ignorant in giving such an impression.

    Obviously I have read his post in a different way to the majority of respondents - including yourself - and got a different message as a result. I'm unlikely to change my opinion about his post just as you are unlikely to change you opinion about both his post and mine. That's why I thought there was no need to debate further, because I thought it unlikely to change anything and would only consume time. I do, however, welcome the opportunity to clarify myself. I often appear unable to do this until after the fact.

    I would like to make clear that only my first post in this thread was made in anger. This and my last reply have been made calmly and have contained no (intentional) malice.
     
  8. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    That may have been the message you got, but that's not what AndyDEL appears to have meant --nor what I read in it. Perhaps your own script at work here.

    I understand that you may feel angry and frustrated by your own experiences, but there's no reason to lash out at others like that when they have the balls to openly admit how scary their period of unemployment was. At least he was reaching out to people who may be struggling with their own (worries about facing) unemployment, which may help them in some way. Blowing your stack in return doesn't help anybody, least of all yourself.
     
  9. cjmUK

    cjmUK Old git.

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    Red, I do think you read AndyDELs post different to the rest of us, but even if his message had been all sweetness and light, your reaction was unwarranted. By all means, tell your own story if it adds to the discussion, but don't start a p*ssing contest to see who has been the most badly done to.

    Personnally I liked Andy's post and I could identify with it. By coincidence, I've just recounted when I got sacked on another thread. While not quite the same circumstances, given that it was 8 months before I was getting married, I remember the same anxiety and stress (enough to risk 6 months on Seroxat). And 8 years later, I still feel the effects. Even though I've been in my current role fo 6.5 years, I still don't ever feel secure & I'm always planning for disaster (not a bad thing I suppose). I still remember wondering if I'd ever get a job in the industry again or whether taking a 'desperation' job like shop work or bar keeping would signal the death knell of my career.

    Currently, I work for a 16-strong holding company, that owns 3 manufacturing companies in the UK and Sweden. For 9 months of this year we've had record turnover, record profits and record expansion, and then in the last 3 months we've laid off 80 people (out of 500-600 in total) - mainly due to our big (automotive) customers cancelling most of their orders.

    It's odd. Despite times being hard now, we're really optimistic about the future. We're moving two factories to bigger premises and building another plant in Germany. Things will be lean for a few months but we're still preparing for growth. A drop in the ocean perhaps, but we're a sign that Britain still has some sort of manufacturing base.

    It's a double-edged sword, but at xmas my contract was changed so that both sides now need to give 3 months notice. It will make it a little harder for me to look for work if I am so inclined, but equally it re-assuring that they're making it much more expensive for them to get rid of me.
     
  10. freedom810

    freedom810 Minimodder

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    I know its not in proportion with all your jobs as I rely on my parents for a living, (Who im pretty sure have stable jobs espiecally my dad being an associate) anyway Ive been looking for my first part time job for awhile now, no luck what so ever. Even Tesco said no :( Tried commet today and no jobs at all, not even an application to give me...Did manage to get an application for 'pets at the home' or somthing like that...oooo maybe Ill be handling rabbits?!
     
  11. steveo_mcg

    steveo_mcg What's a Dremel?

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    One day you'll look back fondly on your job handling rabbits, i just wish the paper round I did on a Sunday morning paid my bills.
     
  12. Firehed

    Firehed Why not? I own a domain to match.

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    Getting paid to play with rabbits would be like falling in a vat of awesome sauce.
     
  13. boiled_elephant

    boiled_elephant Merom Celeron 4 lyfe

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    I think your two correspondents would have been more than willing to change their opinions about your posts if you'd changed your attitude even slightly- perhaps made, through tone and style, some sympathetic gesture or apology for the rudeness of your first post; but the impression I got was that you were essentially defending it. And that's still the impression I get.

    Also, I can see why you'd want to bug out of a non-constructive debate like that, but for future reference people often find it insulting. Not that that will stop me from doing so: Im' taking my cigarette lighter out of here before the flamethrowers come out. Bai bai :)
     
  14. JADS

    JADS Et arma et verba vulnerant

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    I was made redundant from Raymarine on the 12th of December last year and haven't managed to find another position yet. I must say though that I vehemently disagree with comments that a job is more important than location. A job is just a job at the end of the day, but where you live is a part of you. My girlfriend and I love living by the sea and wouldn't give it up regardless of the salary on offer.

    Fortunately close to where I live there are a number of large defence companies that are hiring software engineers so hopefully something will turn up soon. I'm waiting to hear back from a recent interview and have some interest from another local employer.

    In life people come first, where you live comes second, and the job you do comes a distant third.
     
  15. jakeo

    jakeo Swarley

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    I'm glad it all worked out for you in the end. Theres nothing worse than looking in your wallet to find only some dust and reciepts.
    My father just recently got made redundant, in arguably the worst time to do it in - in the middle of a recession at Christmas time. I still don't know how he pulled that off tbh.
    He's still job hunting at the moment, so I hope he gets one soon.
     
  16. DXR_13KE

    DXR_13KE BananaModder

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    i agree completely with the above phrase.
     
  17. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    Commendable thoughts --in theory. I'd love living by the seaside, but doing so in a cardboard box would take the shine of things a bit, I suspect. A steady income is kind of important to the quality of life you manage to attain in a given location.

    There has to be compromise, I'm afraid. I emigrated for my job --left people and location far behind me. There is no comfort being near friends or relatives, or a place that feels at home when you cannot afford to live there. Those Eastern european immigrants that come here taking doing our jobs realise that. So did the Asian immigrants before them. This is why they will achieve far more in their lifetime than any of the whiney locals who just sit on their ass moaning about heir misfortune --a bit like my Dutch psychology colleagues who still haven't got a steady job back home.
     
  18. boiled_elephant

    boiled_elephant Merom Celeron 4 lyfe

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    Sounds like the three priorities are irreconcilable, except by random chance. I've had to give up one for the others on several occasions now, and I don't expect to ever get all 3 spot on. When it comes down to it, I suspect I'll prioritise money over people - simply because you can always make a load then catch up with people later on, whereas job opportunities can't exactly be put on hold. Also, as nexxo hinted at, socialising isn't that great if you're poor.
     
  19. Guest-16

    Guest-16 Guest

    It depends on your priorities in life. Ive been in: **** job, decent pay and **** pay, good job. Now Im in half decent pay, good job, soon to be working in central London which I swore I'd never, ever do. Personally I figure I spend most of my day in work so I better like that and the people more than the location, but if I had a missus/kids then that would take a greater priority I'd imagine.

    I am doing a job with less pay, but more fun than having potentially more pay (I gave up my PhD to be a journalist) but mind numbing boredom.
     
  20. mrbungle

    mrbungle Undercooked chicken giver

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    It's tricky.

    Once your a certain age, say late 20's with a bit of a C.V. and a decent education you just see how many bar jobs or supermarket jobs you get offered when you REALLY need one.

    They see you have a degree they know your going to leave asap, in the current climate unless you fake your C.V. your going to find it tricky.

    Nice story but there are alot of people around who are unemployed with much less adaptable skills.

    Grats for the future though :)
     

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