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LOL Security Fixes for everything!

Discussion in 'General' started by mikemaher205, 8 Jul 2013.

  1. mikemaher205

    mikemaher205 New Member

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    I have a crazy theory that might just be true...

    We read about government spying in on us (lies) and hackers steeling the identity of our unborn children through social media, and every day a story of a new security flaw in some popular software allows people in the middle east to find us and destroy us. If you read and believe this like the Daily Mail does, then you can expect to be cloned, have your ID stolen and die of some horrible disease in about... 15 minutes time. Twice.

    But I have a fix for all this hacking and security. Want to send some information to someone, and it's kind of important? Send it as a hand written, paper letter. Hear me out...

    If you hand write someone using a gel pen or pencil so you don't have to press hard, on a single sheet of paper on a hard surface, you won't leave a trace or copy of the text you're writing. Think about it, every time you type, a key logger could copy the text. Word processors store everything you do and delete so you can undo mistakes. This data is stored with your letter or messages every single time. Writing by hand ensures only one, non-recoverable copy is made.

    Now for sending it... This relies on putting the letter in a box that someone you don't know will go into, take said letter, give it to someone else who puts it into a machine that gives it to another person... You get the idea. But at no point is this information (other than address) easily available. I admit someone could open the letter and read it, but in this day and age, who's really using letter (like bills and bank statements) to get your details when the same effort for getting one could net 1,000 on-line? Alternatively you could actually give the paper letter to the person in question to avoid the above flaw.

    I would like to declare that this is not a serious belief of mine, just something I made up over a tea in work one day. I was bored. As I am now, hence I'm sharing this with Bit-Tech.

    I'm here till 3. Thank you. :rock:
     
  2. miller

    miller New Member

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    You know what I'm going to say right, Umm, why not just tell them face to face :worried:
     
  3. BentAnat

    BentAnat Software Dev

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    Aren't you increasing the likelihood of the government spying on you when you do it this way? Since no one uses letters anymore, surely all the dodgy people are the only ones still left...
     
  4. mrbungle

    mrbungle Undercooked chicken giver

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    Someone might hear you!
     
  5. GoodBytes

    GoodBytes How many wifi's does it have?

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  6. faugusztin

    faugusztin I *am* the guy with two left hands

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  7. miller

    miller New Member

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    Mmm, how about communicating with sign language in a darkened room whilst wearing glow in the dark gloves, you wouldn't look too suspicious or draw too much attention to yourself :lol:
     
  8. Krikkit

    Krikkit All glory to the hypnotoad! Super Moderator

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    The easiest way not to be intercepted is to load your mundane pictures on facebook/flickr etc with encrypted, steganographised messages. Lost in a sea of other crap, no-one will look at them.
     
  9. steveo_mcg

    steveo_mcg New Member

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    I went outside once, the temperature controls were all over the place and I caught a cold. Best pay for a courier to pick up your "letter" and transport it to the recipient. I'd also recommend encryption, just because its offline is not excuse for sloppy data security.
     
  10. B1GBUD

    B1GBUD ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Accidentally Funny

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  11. Yariko

    Yariko New Member

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    This fixes every security related issue:

    [​IMG]
     
  12. ferret141

    ferret141 Well-Known Member

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    What if the pen and pencil companies are in on it with the governments and mix radioactive materials into their consumable stationary so that even if letters leave no impression they can still "x-ray" them to read the contents.

    Now where's my tinfoil hat......
     
  13. miller

    miller New Member

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    It's the ink, nano GPS trackers...this cells yours :wallbash:
     
  14. PsYcHoTiC_MaDmAn

    PsYcHoTiC_MaDmAn Unholy Cyborg Fruit Machine

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    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-22557875

    and as gel pens use metal based pigments this should allow reading of contents without opening envelope.

    and as most letters are relatively few sheets a bit of computer analysis should allow the reassembly of text despite overlaps.

    that said, suspect a sheet of foil would render that aspect useless, thereby forcing them to use the kettle steam method.

    a much more secure method is the stenography mentioned already
     
  15. mikemaher205

    mikemaher205 New Member

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    There's some genuinely good improvements on my theory in this post. I expected to be told to shut up.

    Also, where are tin foil hats available from? I bet you could make an eBay company that specialises in anti-government-spying equipment like them. Dragon's Den anybody?
     
  16. Nexxo

    Nexxo * Prefab Sprout – The King of Rock 'n' Roll

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    And all of a sudden all those LOLcat and duckface pictures start to make sense... :p
     
    djzic likes this.

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