Discussion in 'General' started by DeadP1xels, 11 Jan 2011.
What the **** have I started.
Not sure Matt, but I'm scared...
If she is having a bad time with this beanpole dude, then you should just flat out ask her, otherwise, she might just turn you into an agony uncle and you will be trapped in friendzone hell for all eternity.
So just ask her... before she starts to think you don't fancy her... or your too much of a wimp to ask... I mean what girl goes for that?
Oh and remember the old adage, women need a reason to have sex... men just need a place.
@mankz... careful chap, you'll have someone's eye out with that
True dat, happened to me after 6 years... man that was a kick in the balls!
Thats not exactly a bad thing....
Generally if that happens i end up revealing my feelings and not even knowing it
so if she said "oh i think he might have kissed another girl " or "Oh i think he likes another girl" then i would end up replying something along the lines of "He would be a ****ing fool to give up a girl like you"
so possibly that might be a good thing
Ummmm DeadP1xels, the girl you like, is with another man, but you continue to desperately drool over her.
Because she is your soul mate? I doubt it, since you had no idea if she was in a relationship or not, you still have no idea if she would like to go out with you or not, so I think the only reason you continue to like this girl is because she seems nice, looks good, and you've been looking at her for a while now.
Defending messing with a girl in a relationship, with "It's not so bad if I end up in the friendzone is it?" is not only pathetically desperate, but it's also trying to steal the girl out of a relationship, using lies such as "come with me to lunch, so I can talk to you about..." when the truth is "come and spend some time with me, so I can try to steal you away from your man with my unattractive desperation, and I will settle for being in the friendzone if that means I can be that little bit closer to you"
There is nothing nice that can be said for someone that would try to go out with a girl whom they know is in a relationship, or for anyone would advise that you try this.
I'm happy to spell out in black and white what I think, even if that seems mean, but to me, to not discourage you from moving on would be mean.
I do not take any pleasure from reading that you are not moving on, and there are no nice people here with any significant dating experience, who is suggesting that you not move on but continue to chase her. There are heaps of other girls, hot girls, at the cafe, the bus stop, everywhere, girls you don't work with! Just go for it dude, give them a chance
If I read a post telling us about how you crashed and burned asking out a girl, that's ok, as it means you have some more experience. Tell us about it, and we can suggest what may have gone wrong.
mvagusta just said what everyone here was thinking.
If you ain't careful you will start obsessing about this 1 girl and probably let 10 others slip by unnoticed.
I think we have all been there and done that.
Im not planning to do any stealing from anything... i said that before i merly said if things ever go tits up i want to make her "aware" of my feelings
If i go in all guns blazing im going to end up with a full blown blood bath with a 7ft tall guy i don't want that, he could be a perfectly nice chap, he could be a complete **** who knows either way im not going to try anything to destroy a relationship.
Now i know this i will probebly go back into blending into the background and just being friends with her
If she is not going out with this guy then im taking my chances because if i don't i will regret it not growing a pair getting off my lazy ass and just coming out with it, if she says no then atleast i gave it a red hot crack
That is all
THREAD = DIE NAO PLEASE!!
That's good dude
Maybe now you have enough fire in your belly to not hesitate with the next girl you see
"Do you smoke after sex?"
"I don't know, I never check"
The FBI has now red-flagged this thread.
This could be the worst post bump i have done but i've made slight progress! somebody might be intrested i guess..
Since last time she has now found a new job closer to where she lives so bus money and journey times won't be an issue anymore, it was crushing because this mean't never would i be able to tell her how i feel, and possibly never even see her again. (its only 9 miles away but the chances of finding the garage the new job is at is very slim!)
I left it be but the thought of letting her go without even attempting made me feel sick.... literally, i decided it was time to anything so i decided to give her a note after a few drafts on my own i decided it was time for some outside help so i gave 4 helpful bit-techers a pm to see if they could help me out they all were kind enough to help.
After about 10 drafts of my own someone came through and gave me a fantastic note to give her, i wanted to tell her how i feel but make it clear i was'nt trying to effect any relationships she might be already in and point out but still be very flattering (mine failed at that)
Heres what she came up with!
I made a few changes to it so this is not exactly what i gave her.
I new she was working tonight on a shutdown shift so there was'nt going to be many people there i decided it was my best time to give it a shot, went in to *check my hours* (i practically know them of by heart the amount of times i check) anyway i needed a reason
As soon as i walked in i heard her say "Hi! Jordan!" she was'nt even in the room but somehow she "saw me coming" we had 3-4minutes of friendly banter and laughs as she went in and out cleaning tables
She finally came back in when i was ready and i pulled the note from my wallet
"Can you do me a favour?"
"Read this, don't show anyone else you'll understand why"
"Ok no problem"
and i walked out saying bye to her and everyone there.... suddenly this massive weight was lifted from me i finally done it (probebly not in the greatest way) but still i did it!
Now the ball is in her court i told her in the note i wanted to be friends and gave my number and Msn incase she wanted to talk.
She is the kind of girl i expect would prefer to speak to me face to face about it and so im going in on friday slightly early to have a drink in the canteen where she will be, just to give her the chance, if she ignores me or trys to avoid me then i know its was'nt to be and i have'nt lost anything in trying.
You know, you could have just walked up to her and said something like "we should still hang out after you leave"
It's a good thing you told her that you wanted to ask her out but it came out a bit creepy imo, not to mention... inconfident? You haven't been paying attention to your fellow bit-techers have you
What sounds more interested: "We should hang out after you leave" or a meaningful letter stating feelings and giving contact details?
Good luck Dead! It'd be a real shame for you to lose her just because of different jobs.
Interrested? Pixel apparently told her that he wants to be friends.
As for resorting to giving her a shy note practically telling her that he's obsessed with her but she probably wouldn't be interrested; In my experience (and i have solid experience at failing with girls) that's what one does after thinking "I've had enough of this stress, i'll just tip over the bucket and hope for the best - but i'm not desperate enough tell her in person so i'll write a note :3"
I do believe that being relatively casual remains a better option.
I really hope that she miraculously finds something super-attractive about this and jumps into Pixel's arms but i have my doubts.
EDIT: re: "meaningful" - you don't have to proudly spell out every single feeling you have for someone to make them understand that you care for them. That tends to be counter-productive, and casual can be meaningful too.
Also i hope i'm not being too negative here, but i feel strongly about what i consider to be Pixel's mistakes as i've made the same ones in the past.
Buy a safe.
Bit-tech has reverted back to before puberty...
Separate names with a comma.