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News More than 28 game-based movies being made

Discussion in 'Article Discussion' started by CardJoe, 19 Dec 2008.

  1. CardJoe

    CardJoe Freelance Journalist

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  2. liratheal

    liratheal Sharing is Caring

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    Enter: 28 movies of pure suck, stage left!
     
  3. Slyporkie

    Slyporkie Fear not the bacon

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    If its not a Hollywood remake, then it's a movie based on a game. These people get the "big bucks" for re-hashing old stories or re-hasing stories people have lived through a game.

    So, to conclude, filmakers will now be known as historians!
     
  4. Bauul

    Bauul Sir Bongaminge

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    My prediction: 90% of them will never make it to the cinema, and the other 10% will all suck.

    Apart from the Legend of Chun-Li, gratuitus anime boob shots for the win!
     
  5. liratheal

    liratheal Sharing is Caring

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    Counteracted by **** dubs or **** acting or even a combination of the two.
     
  6. CardJoe

    CardJoe Freelance Journalist

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    It isn't anime. It's live action, with Kristin Kreuk as Chun-Li.
     
  7. Jamie

    Jamie ex-Bit-Tech code junkie

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    She's going to need implants to play the role.
     
  8. Jordan Wise

    Jordan Wise Baby called to see the boss...

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    Yeah, but she's pretty enough
     
  9. Bauul

    Bauul Sir Bongaminge

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    There's still gonna be gratuitus boob shots.

    Or I won't go see it.
     
  10. perplekks45

    perplekks45 LIKE AN ANIMAL!

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    Kane & Lynch and BioShock. The rest... screw it. Reminds me I still have to watch Max Payne tho I think it'll suck.
     
  11. Yemerich

    Yemerich I can has PERSUADETRON?

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    Dang! I was hoping for Gong Li for Chun-Li...
    Kane and Lynch is a lame game... Sorry to say it...
    I still have hope that they DON'T make Bioshock the movie, as i don't have any hopes left for a good movie adaptation from games...
     
  12. D3s3rt_F0x

    D3s3rt_F0x New Member

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    Couldnt see one game there that would suit a movie, Halo didnt really have a story in the first place so I guess they could write one from scratch for it but lets face it'll then be crap lol

    Bioshock is a possibility but only if it was big budget done by a proper director with vision, but lets face it that aint gonna happen.

    Acctually Kane & Lynch could maybe come alright but only if it has a gun battle like Heat. Lets just hope Mortal Kombats better than the previous efforts.

    Although there is one game movie I did enjoy which was Doom mainly cause it was funny and me and my mate laughed all the way through while this lass behind us kept breathing heavy cause she was scared.
     
  13. Lepermessiah

    Lepermessiah New Member

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    it will be a miracle of anymore then 1-2 of those actually turn out decent.
     
  14. BigD79

    BigD79 Gadding about...

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    yup, pretty much was i was going to say.
     
  15. roryok

    roryok New Member

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    Cold Fear (2008)
    Is that the thing on the boat? That sucked. Although I've seen films with worse plots.

    Fear Effect (2008)
    Nope. Don't remember that game.

    Area 51 (2009)
    Game Plot - There are aliens in area 51, shoot them.
    Film Plot. There are aliens in Area 51. Watch someone who was in Smallville or Stargate SG1 shoot at them, and eventually escape.

    Castlevania (2009)
    How does one make a platform film? This will be interesting.

    Clock Tower (2009)
    Is this a game? A building perhaps, but surely not a game!

    Halo (2009)
    I thought this was cancelled? Werent there rumours Peter Jackson was to direct then the whole thing went belly up?

    Kane & Lynch (2009)
    Bank robbers usually make for good film material, but I think the game origin negates that.

    The Legend of Spyro (2009)
    Cartoon maybe....

    Metal Gear Solid (2009)
    this could be interesting... a nice anime film of it would be better

    Onimusha (2009)
    This one is CGI, probably the only genre that suits the game-to-film fiasco

    Sabotage 1943 (2009)
    Again, I've yet to hear of it.

    Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009)
    Anime? God I hope so.

    Spy Hunter (2009)
    Cock Hunter.

    The Suffering (2009)
    The Audience will do all the suffering (LOL I AM SO FUNNY)

    Tekken (2009)
    Sweet Zombie Jesus. A StreetFighter, a DOA and Two Mortal Kombat films later and they still haven't learned. Wake up hollywood suits - you can't just take every popular game and turn it into a film!

    Warcraft (2009)
    How would this even work?

    Bioshock (2010)
    I used to whinge about how bioshock could suck as a film, but its the only one on the list so far with any potential!

    Broken Sword: The Shadow of the Templars (2010)
    Or maybe it isn't....

    Driver (2010)
    Starring Jason Statham, being apparently the only actor left who can drive.

    Earthworm Jim (2010)
    There was an earthworm Jim cartoon I think, but I'm guessing this would be a guy-in-a-suit movie like those hilarious Martin Lawrence capers.

    Gears of War (2010)
    If we can successful offload that wankbag Cliffy B onto the film industry, the unavoidably awful film that results will have been worth it.

    God of War (2010)
    starring Brendan Fraser. Probably. Did anyone see him drunk on the Graham Norton show the other night?

    Joust (2010)
    Or 'A Knights Tale, The Game' The Movie. Except without Heath Ledger obviously.

    King of Fighters (2010)
    See 'Tekken'

    Mortal Kombat (2010)
    OMFG See Tekken Already

    Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (2010)
    Is this with Jake Gylenhall? did he read the script at all? Hey that rhymes!

    Resident Evil 4 (2010)
    I have a funny story for this one. My friends 7 year old cousin has ADD, and he loved Resident Evil. After he saw it, he started writing the script for a sequel. Well, to be honest he was more drawing page after page of men shooting dogs, but apparently thats what happened in the first one. Anyway. When the second one came out, I read a review that stated that the script was so convoluted that it appeared 'to have been written by a 7 year old with ADD'. I can only assume the kid sent in his pages of canine hatred and they actually used it.

    Splinter Cell (2010)
    Has some potential, in a kind of a Tom Clancy writes Jason Bourne kind of way.

    World of Warcraft (2011)
    Wait. Wait wait wait. They're making a WoW film seperately to a Warcraft film? Oh wait! Maybe the <em>Warcraft</em> film will go straight to DVD, but you'll only be able to download the WoW film.


    I am shocked. Shocked! Well I'm not <em>that</em> shocked. Hollywood is all about the dosh, and all these films rely on the same principle. Trick just enough people who played the game into going to see it to make the costs back, and hopefully a get a few quid more out of them.

    So what games would make for good films? It's hard to say. I could take the moral high ground and say that there simply arent ANY games that translate to the screen properly, but then again I feel like Monkey Island would have made a cracking film, if only the guys who made Pirates of the Caribbean hadn't stolen most of the plot and charaters from it.

    And now that I think of it, there are a few others that would have worked.

    Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis - anything would be better than the Crystal Skull. This could have come close to Crusade.
    (the argument here of course, is that this wouldn't be a movie of a game, but simply a sequel to an existing film, on which the game is based)
    Crimson Skies - either the PC original or the Xbox sequel. But again, Sky Captain pretty much stole its thunder.
    Grim Fandango - it might be quite beetlejuice-ical, but that would be no bad thing.
     
  16. badders

    badders Neuken in de Keuken

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    You win the internet this week!!
     
  17. liratheal

    liratheal Sharing is Caring

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    From the top down:

    Wasn't that the mediocre game that had a sequel with some sort of lesbian undertones? Cel-shaded or something.

    It's Halo - Nothing is ever canceled. Except the box of "Good" that seems missing from everything Halo related.

    MGS needs to die, and soon. I love the series, but by god. 20 years is too long.

    Warcraft, and by extension, the World thereof has quite a large pool of lore to draw from - I expect that's the basis for these two abominations.

    I wouldn't say he can drive, as such, but perhaps that he's the only actor left who is willing to do driving movies.

    I wish I'd seen Brendan Fraser drunk.. For God of War, though, I imagine they'd cast some clown as Kratos. Like The Rock. Or Dwayne Jerkoff, whatever he wants to be called now.

    Think 2 was bad? Should have seen 3. 3 sounds even more like your friends 7 year old cousins canine hate.

    If by that you mean, more guns and more glowy lights, then sure. Shouldn't Sam Fisher be dead by now? All the stress that these missions put on him must have significantly weakened him in old age - Which is where he should now logically be.

    See Warcraft. I think they'd try and tell the Burning Crusade story - There's more reason for explosions AFAIK.
     
  18. Redbeaver

    Redbeaver The Other Red Meat

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    Castlevania, MSG, warcraft (huh??lol)....


    ... and Splinter Cell, omfg........ hell yeah...
     
  19. C-Sniper

    C-Sniper Stop Trolling this space Ądmins!

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    I think that if a proper director is in charge of Bioshock then it could be a good movie.
     
  20. E.E.L. Ambiense

    E.E.L. Ambiense Acrylic Heretic

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    MGS would look great if Square Pictures was contracted to handle a CGI-based film. Live-action....nothing but fear comes to mind.
     
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